Chas Langley isn’t one for formalities. Standing in the barebones kitchen of Honey Biscuits, he hollers, “Now, make sure you get the Styrofoam plate in that picture. That’s kind of my trademark.”

“Uh, why?” I snap back with crumbs of sweet pastry (what he calls Fat Rascalz) flying from my mouth as I focus the camera on a plate of fried chicken and rice (trying not get the Styrofoam). “It’s not exactly environmentally friendly.”

“No it’s not, but it makes the food taste better,” he says with a sidelong grin. It’s a look that straddles between totally serious and absolutely messing with me. In this situation, I do what comes naturally. Laugh hysterically and try not to choke on my sweet tea.

Better not to argue with Chas. Just sit and eat whatever he feels like serving you. And feel pretty lucky for the opportunity.

Though it’s been around for more than two years, Honey Biscuits has remained well under the radar for some unknown reason. Serving up serious southern soul food–fried chicken, okra, red beans & rice, sweet potato pie, beignets, jambalaya, creamy potato salad, their trademark biscuits, sweet, fruit-studded Rascalz pastries and, well, whatever Chas feels like cooking that day–Honey Biscuits is little more than a tiny storefront in Cotati’s Grapevine shopping center.

There’s one communal table, plastic utensils, and a CD player you have to control your dang self. And that’s about it, aside from Chas (and sometimes his mom) serving up plates of food from breakfast through dinner.

But lest you think this is some gnarly Crisco-fest, Chas is quick to point out that he is, after all, from Marin. Southern Marin, to be exact, and all the produce gets delivered fresh from Laguna Farms and keeps the grease to a minimum. The Rascalz, in fact, are only 2 points on Weight Watchers. It’s his California contribution.

Nice to know. But this ain’t the time to be calorie-counting.

Best bets: Let Chas make you up a plate. It’s more food than you’ll ever eat and includes one of their lush honey biscuits for just $8. Beignets are made fresh on Saturdays and Sundays. All food is cooked to order, so don’t be in a fired-up hurry, now. Oh, and since you asked, he gets most of his recipes from his mom, who is also from Marin. But they’ve got family in Louisiana. Close enough.

NOTE: HONEY BISCUITS CLOSED A WEEK AFTER THIS REVIEW. DANG.

Honey Biscuits, 7981 Old Redwood, #D Cotati, 707.795.9000

Local is the new organic. Meaning that buying tasty little organic kiwis from New Zealand is nice and all, but you’ve just helped destroy the ozone with god knows how much jet and diesel fuel getting it here. You cad, you.

During the last weeks of April, locavores “activists who try to eat only foods grown within 150 miles “are trying something different. Called the Pennywise Eat Local Challenge, they’ll not only try to eat seasonal foods that are grown within the local foodshed, but also debunk the idea that you can’t eat locally on a budget. As in a little under $70 per person, per week.

Yeah, it’s pretty extreme, and frankly, probably hard for most of us to actually accomplish. What about coffee? (Sorry, no coffee plantations around here, although Ft. Bragg’s Thanksgiving Coffee or Sebastopol’s Taylor Maid are organic, sustainable compromises.) What about salt? Or locally milled flours?

When you get right down to it, even here in Sonoma County, where you can hardly sneeze without hitting a sustainable farm, eating locally isn’t as easy as it sounds. But are you willing to make the effort?

Here are a few places to start:

Pinnacle Market: A small market in downtown Graton that sticks to locally-grown, seasonal products. Produce, fish, eggs, bread, meat and cheese. “We’re the local version of Whole Foods,” says owner Janna Anderson. Open Tuesday through Sunday from 11am to 7pm, 9056 Graton Road, Graton.

Greenstring Farm: Beyond organic, locally grown and foraged produce. Incredible eggs. Greenstring Farm, 3571 Old Adobe Road, Petaluma, 707.249.0144

Food Routes: Where does your food come from? Check out this national efffort at Foodroutes.org

Local Harvest: Another national effort to bring together farmers and eaters

Five words: Phyllis’ Giant Burgers is open.

Don’t miss: The cheese steak is a monster of a meal, with green peppers, onions and juicy, greasy meat on a fresh roll. Homemade milkshakes of every flavor and hue make it worth the subsequent coronary. And, of course, there are the burgers. But you knew that.

Phyllis’ Giant Burgers, 4910 Sonoma Hwy Santa Rosa, 707.538.4000. Open 11am to 9pm daily.

Love your burgers? Check out BiteClub’s Best Burgers showdown.

I realize I’m coming to the party about three years too late. Postmodern cuisine–you know, that wacky food created with foam, lasers and the powdered essence of an extinct Chilean tree frog–has seen its star begin to fall into the centrifuge of weird gastronomic trends.

Kind of like aspic. Or the whole resurgence of lettuce wedges.

But come on. Even on the downhill slide, having someone bring a hissing pan of liquid nitrogen to your table is a damn lot of fun. Especially when they ask you to eat what’s in it.

Part of my recent trip to Chicago was to immerse myself in the post-modern gastronomy movement. Two of its most celebrated proponents, Alinea and Moto, have gained international notoriety for serving, er…bacon on a trapeze, among other things in epic 12 and 24-course eat-a-thons.

Here you don’t just eat dinner, you experience it. These are dishes that require extensive explanations recited with spelling-bee accuracy. (At Alinea, you won’t get a menu, anyway. Instead you get ‘surprises’. At whiz-kid younger brother Moto, you get an edible menu. Seriously.)

These meals require the use of words like ‘vessicle’ and ‘sous vide’ and ‘explosion’. There are warnings (I kid you not, there is danger involved); dozens of sets of place settings; butt-numbing endurance; and ultimately simply letting go to the wonder and fantasy that is unfurling before you.

Everywhere, what you see is not what you see. That little piece of penne pasta is actually a lychee! Hah! That little piece of beef is shaved chocolate! That piece of cake is actually a vacuum-expanded beet! Imagine that!

Every bite is an exclamation point, performed with an infectious enthusiasm. And damn if I didn’t catch a little of it, clapping in glee at the little tubes of pureed morels unbottled with satisfying ‘flwump’. I gasped at a single fork of tweezer-placed microgreens! Ohmygod! Can you believe the hands-free dessert of cake and spun sugar that’s bobbing in front of my mouth like an eyeball? Or the the meyer lemon foam, cotton candy paper and ‘shooter’ of horseradish truffle and celery juice (a rather nasty surprise). Our tour of the Moto kitchen even required special eye protection and a laser demonstration. Pinch me, Alice, I’m dreamin’!

Both dinners were, in a word, outrageous. Both dinners were unforgettable and worth every penny (upwards of $250 each). But ultimately, I’m left a little hungry.

Yes, I mean literally hungry (microgreens and foam, you may be surprised to find out, aren’t that filling). But also, hungry for something a little less philosophical on the plate–something that doesn’t require me to ponder whether that soba noodle on the plate is really a soba noodle-or an extruded puree of fried rice with big ambitions.

Don’t get me wrong, I also sometimes find our overly precious, introspectively organic California cuisine a little on the philosophical side, too. Seriously, I want a carrot, not a dissertation.
You have to wonder, however, how long all this gastro-naval-gazing is actually going to last–here at home, in Chicago, New York or elsewhere. Food has become so preoccupied with itself that eating can be an exhausting lesson, rather than a meal. Not to mention the kind of guilt inherent in spending the aforementioned $350–even for food art–when others are starving.

But there I go getting all philosophical. Man, I need a taco. Hold the microgreens.

Alinea, 1723 North Halsted, Chicago, Illinois, 312-867-0110
Moto, 945 w. fulton market, chicago, Illinois, 312.491.0058

Sausage is a religion in Chicago. And Hot Doug’s is the high altar where locals come to pray from 10:30am to 4pm daily in a steady stream of devotion.

We all stand quietly, penitently in a growing line that snakes down the block outside the small suburban diner. Slowly, the line moves forward a person at a time toward the counter, until you’re finally rewarded with a puff of warm air perfumed by duck fat and frying meat. Hallelujah, baby.

This is the real Chicago–far from touristy Michigan Avenue (where Hard Rock Cafes and Rock ‘n Roll McDonalds pack-em in) and the trendy linen-topped tables where pseudo-California cuisine abounds. I’m at Hot Doug’s Sausage Superstore and Cased Meat Emporium freezing my ass off, and just about as excited as a four-year-old.

Why? Duck fat. My heart is racing (and probably anticipating severe cardiac distress) at the thought of a crispy sausage and French fries cooked in pure duck fat. This is the kind of meal so horrifyingly bad for you that you can’t help but savor every crispy bite.

But that’s just the start. Here at Doug’s, the menu runs from straight up corn dogs to spicy sausage, along with the special ‘Game’ menu that today features ostrich sausage swimming in a bath of Crème de Cassis and tart cherries, all topped with sharp cheddar cheese. I love the Midwest.

Duck fat fries and an ostrich dog, (including a drink): $11. Feeling like you just found a lard-filled nirvana: Priceless.

Hot Doug’s Encased Meat Emporium, 3324 North California, Chicago, 773.279.9550

Next up: Post-modern cuisine at Moto and Alinea.

Chicago in April is cold. As in an maybe 37 degrees and sleeting–in stark contrast to the lush, almost summer-like conditions I left in Sonoma County last week.

Now granted, it was a little thick-headed, but thinking of spring back home, I actually asked someone if there were any good farm markets I could visit around here. She looked at me like I had two heads. Right. It’s winter here. Local produce is still months away. Unless of course, you’re into ramps.

Sometimes it takes getting away from home to really appreciate, well, home.

Over the last couple of days, I’ve been trying to eat my way through Chicago as well as attending a food conference that has organics and sustainability (along with post modern gastronomy, but that’s another story) as its foundation.

The whole thing is actually pretty surreal. To my insulated Cali-thinking, I forget that for much of the country, organics, farm markets and sustainable practices are pretty much in their infancy. Locally-grown foods have a wow-factor that’s palpable. And, many of the high-end restaurants here in Chicago are doing the kind of farm-centric menus that we’ve seen in Northern California for years. Artisan meats, root purees, you know the drill. Farm chic is totally hip.

In fact, yesterday, I made a trek across town to a restaurant called FEED for roasted chicken, fries and corn pudding “down home kind of stuff. The interior: Think Moline feed store. The food: Think Moline feed store. In a good way. It was homey and warm. It was cheap. And they had chocolate cake. But the whole thing seemed so out of place in this downtrodden industrial neighborhood. A sort of country-show for urbanites. But all I could think of was how much better I liked the exact same meal–chicken and fries at the recently-opened West County Grill a few weeks ago, not just because uber chef Jonathan Waxman made it, but because it just felt more real. Less of a show, but clean, honest, local cooking.

Which is all pretty weird, considering that Illinois is covered with farms. An hour outside of Chicago is pretty much cornfields from here to Colorado. This is true farmland. But even here, they’re relearning much of what we’ve come to accept as standard in California. Fresh. Local. Seasonal.

Now, don’t get me wrong. Chicago has some incredible food. It’s nice to finally eat a pizza that doesn’t contain sundried tomatoes and arugula. I’m loving the omni-present chocolate lounges. You can’t get a better burger (or at least a more nostalgic one) than at Steak & Shake. I’m looking forward to eating at Moto, a post-modern gastroexperience that includes edible paper and (at least at one point) bacon suspended on a trapeze.

But it’s so nice to know that the warm, SoCo spring is waiting for me back at home. Along with a Rosie Chicken or two.

Like you, I love to eat out. And, like you, I have uh, many of those in-between-paycheck days where things have to get a little creative. I have been known, in fact, to dig for change in my backseat just to avoid those gnarly Tupperware bowls of leftovers in the fridge.

So, here are my secret indulgences for when the wallet’s tight. Seven hearty lunches under $7 and five bites under $5. You’ll never have to brown-bag it again.

1. Chiles relleno combination plate ($5.80), Taqueria Las Palmas: Deep-fried delight stuffed with cheese. 415 Santa Rosa Ave, Santa Rosa, 707.546-3091.

2. Tomato basil Panini ($6.50), Fourth Street Market Deli: Yes, it’s a little spendy for a sandwich, but this crispy, pesto-filled monster will satisfy you for hours. 300 Mendocino, Santa Rosa, 707.573.9832

3. Stir fry ($6.95), Great Khan: The trick to Mongolian BBQ is learning the ‘stuff’. Start with the meat and press hard until you’ve got a nice well going on. Then load ’em up. 2109 Santa Rosa plz
Santa Rosa, 527-8482

4. Miang Kom ($6.50), California Thai: Dried shrimp, sugar cane paste, and chilis you wrap with spinach leaves. Entertainment and spice all in one. 522 7th St, Santa Rosa, 573-1441

5.Pesto pizza, Mombo’s Pizza lunch special ($6): A huge slice of pizza “go for the pesto “freshly crisped with a house salad and soda. Okay, it may lack creativity, but when you’re craving the ‘za, there’s no match. 1880 Mendocino Ave # B, Santa Rosa, 528-3278

6. Super buffet Chinese buffet: The buffet formerly known as Fou Zhou II. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. A pound of food for under $6.50 is a deal any day. So what if 99 percent of it is fried? 450 Mendocino Ave, Santa Rosa, 707.523.7000

7. Tikka masala ($6.99) Tandoori Express: Starving students know where the real grub is. This is a favorite guilty pleasure. Plus, some of the freshest naan in town. 1880 Mendocino Ave. #D, Santa Rosa, 707.543.8168

Five under $5

Need a super-budget nosh? Check these out

1. Fish taco ($2.10), Taco Del Mar: SEC Lakeville Hwy & S. Mc Dowell Blvd.
Petaluma, 782-9294

2. Rueben dog ($3.95), Hot Dog City: 631 4th St, Santa Rosa, 579-4885

3. Ceviche ($3), Tonyan Mexican Restaurant: 7293 Roxanne Ln, Rohnert Park, 588-0893

4. Pupusas ($2), Pupuseria Salvadorena, 1403 Maple Ave., Santa Rosa, 707.544.3141

5. Spam musubi ($1.73), Ohana Hawaiian BBQ, 2150 Santa Rosa Ave, Santa Rosa, 707.571.8882. Also in Petaluma, 205 S. McDowell Blvd., 707.766.8282.

Plus, BiteClub heads to the Windy City to eat, eat, eat. Got any favorite Chicago dishes or restaurants you’d like to see me review? Let me know!

BiteClub has learned that Bistro V, the popular, Michelin-rated Sebastopol restaurant owned by Chef Rick Vargas and his wife, Meekk, has gone up for sale.

An advertisement in the Sunday Press Democrat listed the restaurant for $1.25 million and adds, ‘illness forces sale.’ When BiteClub called the restaurant this morning, an employee explained that Vargas’ wife, Meekk, is ill and the couple are seeking someone to take over their beloved spot. The couple opened the restaurant in 2005.

A note signed by Meekk, sent to BiteClub gave her perspective on the departure:

“Ever since we started operating the restaurant, we’ve had good fortune – the crew that assembled is fantastic, the fruit trees and flowers that we’ve planted are blooming, and the customers have become our second family. We’ve had good press, made it into the Zagat and Michellin guides, and were looking forward to growing along with our community.

We would have liked to continue doing this for many years to come, but as things turned out, we are not in a position to do that now.

We’re looking for a buyer that will adopt the restaurant and take good care of it, keeping the crew, the customers, and the three kittens that live under the building happy. We’re looking for someone who is good natured, experienced, and appreciates good food and fine wine.”

A buyer has not yet been found.

The restaurant previously housed long-time French restaurant Chez Peyo.

Bistro V, 2295 Gravenstein Highway, Sebastopol, 707.823.1262