Painful Guy Fieri Video Hurts to Watch

How much "Hurt" can the Mayor of Flavortown endure? New video tests the limits of DDD's Guy Fieri.

A screenshot from Diners Drive Ins and Dives from the Food Network where Fieri gulps some sort of mystery sauce.
A screenshot from Diners Drive Ins and Dives from the Food Network where Fieri gulps some sort of mystery sauce.

There’s a cloud over Flavortown.

Because behind the frosted tips, Von Zipper sunglasses and rock and roll exterior, maybe — just maybe— celebrity chef Guy Fieri is hiding a hole in his Donkey-sauced heart. A hole that can only be filled with hamburger grease and mayonnaise.

Exploding on the interwebs today is a horrifying video mashup of money shots from Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives where Fieri shovels burgers, fried mystery nuggets, chicken wings, other food bombs into his pie hole for a full 3.5 minutes while Johnny Cash sings the “Please Kill Me Now” anthem, “Hurt”.

Not surprisingly, it’s painful to watch as Fieri goes for broke with a gaping maw that would make a great white shark jealous. Again. And again. And again. And again.

NOTE: The video has been removed pending a copyright claim. waa-waa-waa-waaaaaa.

If you can’t take the full video, make a special note at :14 when he two-fists a bite of sandwich and condiment bottle of hot sauce. Twice. An at :28 where he eats a hoagie python-style.

I think he hurt himself today.

After 24 seasons of martyring his arteries on DDD, he’s done his time in culinary purgatory, and you gotta give the Guy credit for sticking it out through ick and grim.

Like Man vs. Food’s Adam Richman, or maybe even Mother Theresa, he endures the pain for us. No matter how much it hurts.


24 thoughts on “Painful Guy Fieri Video Hurts to Watch

  1. Killing himself, so we don’t have to. Thank you for your service, sir! No doubt his juicing regimen while filming kept him out of Camp Lipitor all these years

  2. I think this video is malicious and wrong. It shows how small minded people in Sonoma County can be. Leave Guy Fieri alone and focus on some positive things. He does many things for charity and all these mean spirited comments don’t recognize his contributions. I thought we were a tolerant community. NO FAT SHAMING, NO BULLYING. Why is this posted by @biteclub ?

    1. Malicious??? Last time I checked nobody forced Ferry in front of a camera at gunpoint and told him to stuff his face. Only one to blame is himself. Any criticism or mockery he receives is his own doing.

    2. Quit defending this douche nozzle. He is getting rich at the expense of other Food Network people who have much less ego than he does. Watching him Fag slap his hairdresser was no shock to me what so ever. Just let him go. We have had enough of this tool.

  3. Anything featuring this talentless d-bag is “painful.” His food, his shows, his personality, his persona, the list is endless.

  4. He’ll do anything to get his name in the headlines. Kind of sad. He should focus on his cooking/menu, but then again he is a game show host now isn’t he?

  5. “…sticking it out through ick and grim.” Is that original? Heather, you are a goddess (or Dorothy Parker, at the minimum).

  6. It hasn’t be 24 years for DDD. It first went on the air in November 2006. And the opening sequence of Guy driving down Main Street in Sebastopol shows that there is still hope for meat eaters in West Sonoma County.

  7. It is unthinkable that any Johnny Cash song would be associated in anyway with this fool. I hope he gets sued.

    1. It’s not a Johnny Cash song, it’s a Johnny Cash cover of a Nine Inch Nails song.

  8. Nothing new to see here. Can’t watch that show, watching him use his fat fingers to shove food into his gaping maw over the vat of food being cooked is vomit inducing. Poor Ferry. Rough life.

  9. You guys sure love to bash Guy any chance you get. Perhaps don’t write about him or repost unflattering videos if you don’t like him. Or wait…having him on your site and in your paper gets you views. Hypocrites.

    1. I thought i was pretty flattering, comparing him to Mother Theresa? I have no beef (heh) with him, but he really does kinda ask for ribbing with his whole schtick.

      All of what I write has to get views in order to sell ads, or BiteClub ceases to exist. It’s simple math.

      I have to mix up the content a bit to cast a wide net to different audiences. You may like some of it, you may hate some of it. I’d suggest taking what’s useful and leaving the rest behind. 😉

      Before anyone throws shade at me or the PD, please ask yourself… “Do I support my local paper by buying a subscription?” That’s how we survive to write another day and serve our community. If we’re not doing it right, let us know constructively. That’s how we grow. If you can’t afford a subscription, think about supporting us by clicking on ads or sharing our content. Thanks!

    2. PS. I have tried for YEARS and YEARS to get in with Guy’s people, and write about some of the really positive things he does in the community (because there is a lot). I’ve never been able to get anywhere near him, and when I do see him in person, he’s very polite, but I still get nowhere.

      I do wish our community was more supportive of our own, but unfortunately, Guy has chosen not to work with the local media, so we can only report what we hear. Which isn’t usually very great. Trust me, I’d love to talk to him on the record. It will never happen, though.

    3. Eh? I thought biteclub has given Guy a lot of publicity, fairly, over the years, at all his restaurants, and the PD has as well.

      Restaurants seem to be either “food first; brand next,” or visa versa. People screaming that they don’t like mayonnaise rolls sold as sushi (guilty), should at least respect the fact that Guy has built a brand (and I do). Guy literally hurts himself for his brand, and that’s a fair assessment.

      Some locals just keep knocking it out of the park; and some not so much. But the PD and biteclub has done a very credible job of describing what’s out there as soon as it’s available. I’d rather go biteclub/pd than Michael Bauer/Chron; and I like both.

      Starks and Chandi are both killing it, with Spanish food in Healdsburg that is better than what I had in Granada (the tortilla espanola had potatoes cut perfectly so the texture was the same no matter the bite); and Bibis having better burgers than the predecessor at a much better price and experience. I can’ wait for County Bench.

      Sorry about venting. Time for me to go eat what I like and leave the rest.

  10. I think it depends on who you are. He seems to be passionate about food in his own way. A huge number of people follow him. Others are passionate in that way too. If there is a big-eater in you, whether you indulge or not you might like the video. My eye was drawn to the happy people watching him enjoy the food they created. The problem lies in that the video is in the mainstream media now. It would be better served as a niche video.

    1. The best part of the show is when he’s telling a man or woman with a small restaurant that they did something really special, and watching the look on the cooks’ faces.

Comments are closed.