BiteClub, Fast Food

Denny’s Slamburger

I double dog dare you.

Breakfast, lunch and a day’s worth of calories all for the low low price of $8.95: The Denny’s Slamburger.

On the plate: A half pound burger with bacon, hash browns, a fried egg and cheese sauce on a sesame seed bun. With fries, natch.

Pair with: Four hours of exercise and a cardiogram.

Amount eaten: Less than half. McNibs forcefully removed it.

Nutrition: 1030 calories, 59 grams of fat (22 saturated), 350 mg cholesteral, 1850 mg sodium, 3 grams of fiber, 60 grams of protein.

Denny's Slamburger

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35 thoughts on “Denny’s Slamburger

  1. Everybody is so stupid don’t dislike it until you try it
    Assholes
    I eat it and i weigh less than 150
    Rumbaed people who post stupid comments

  2. After a long night of drinking on the Atlantic City beach in NJ, we found a Dennys and were not disappointed. I was shocked because I was actually impressed. Maybe my expectations were low also. Maybe it was the beer. I wanted a burger because that was the usual goto at 3AM. No patty melt on the menu… Regular burgers @ 7.99, I wanted something thrilling. For 70 cents more was the Bacon Slamburger. I ordered the burger medium well and the egg sunny side up/easy/kinda runny. In ten minutes the food arrived. It looked good. Nice, thin, meaty strips of bacon crossed on top of the cheese sauce (kinda like mornay sauce) on top of a grilled, sesame seeded, mass produced bun. The burger sat on the hash browns that were a tad under done (not raw but soft not fully browned). The egg was just a little under with a touch of white still runny. I ordered the seasoned fries for an extra 50 cents and a Nestea Raspberry to wash it down. The fact that the burger is hand formed allows the juices and fat to distribute throughout the burger in every bite. It kind of crumbles in your mouth compared to pre-formed frozen hockey pucks. I popped the egg and let the yolk run all over my burger. I also broke the bacon in half and laid them on top. This burger was over the top. It was sooo good. It oozed out and onto the plate. I used the fries to mop up the egg, cheese, and burger juice. I ended up cutting the burger in half to make it easier to eat. Oh.my.God… I ate the whole thing… 1010 calories worth of burger not counting the fries and raspberry tea. Can’t eat this on a weekly basis but definitely a satisfying, late night treat after partying.

  3. I’ve had a few of these slamburgers. I had no problem finishing them. They are good. You can tell the meat isn’t up to supermarket quality, but the combo with the egg and hash browns and bacon is very satisfying. It’s a great idea.

  4. I used to work at Tex Wasabi’s. Where it was procedure to pat two of Sysco’s finest frozen burgers into that puck shape for our eclectic customers dining experience. As a “Culinary Worker” the best is always found at home where a meal is special family ritual, not something to line the pocket of some hubris ridden “Chef “.

  5. We all know that if this was served at some trendy local place, it would be a fun novelty item on the menu and everyone would eat it up. Throw the word “Denny’s” in the mix and it automatically makes it trashy. I really have to agree with Heather about people needing to stop sticking up for local food for the sake of it being local. There are some good burgers spots here, but there are a lot of bad ones too. If Denny’s happens to make a better burger than half of SoCo then good on ’em. Maybe it’s time for places like Carmens step their game up.

    Oh and the fact that many here are making comments about the nutritional value of this burger is laughable. You’re probably the same people who will go out to a “nice” restaurant and order meals that have been sauteed in butter, contain high fat-content meat, and eat all the bread and fried appetizers prior to that….not realizing that the macronutrient breakdown of that meal is just as bad, if not worse, than this burger.

  6. That Slam Burger looks better than anything I’ve had at the SYSCO-supplied Johnny Garlic’s — and Guy is Sonoma County’s gift to the culinary world. Go figure.

    If you don’t want to eat it . . . don’t. Just stop whining.

  7. This must be a joke … Heather it is not April foo’s day yet – are you going to cover the ER co-pay for those who go out and eat this and then end up with food poisonig?
    YIKES what is going on with the bite club ?

    1. I’ve eaten this a few times. Never had food poisoning. And what do you eat? Salads? If you’re going to eat burgers and fries, they’ll all give you heart attack, even ones cooked at home, if you eat them all the time. So your comment is a joke, unless you have something personally against Denny’s and like disparaging it because you have a competing restaurant.

  8. Your case in point Heather, while having coffee at Starbucks on the Town Green in Windsor this morning, there it was…. THE SYSCO TRUCK!!!! making a delivery at KC’s Downtown Grill. Burgers there are $14.00 before tax and tip. And the burgers at KC’s do not come with an egg, hashbrowns, cheese sause and bacon.

    1. Actual BEEF costs money Susan. See the Taco Bell post if you’re confused about how chains can sell food so cheap.
      KC’s Patty = actual ground chuck
      Denny’s Patty = Skeletal scrapings and textured vegetable protein.

    2. We used to have our meat delivered once a week from Golden Gate Meat aka Hagemann Meat. It made no difference because our landlord (Kimco Corporation) probably charged Denny’s half the amount we paid them and that’s what put us out of business. Thanks Kimco, if I sound bitter I am.

  9. You can barely see the actual burger patty. Having said that, I’ve had some burgers at high end SoCo places and was not very impressed. Carmens was a huge disappointment and way overpriced for the tough little puck served. At least at In and Out I know I’m getting a decent burger. To each his own.

  10. All the haters here need to get a life. EVERY single story does not have to be peachy, from Main St. local etc…. I too thank you for taking one for the team. I’ll make this my once in a month Man vs. food type of indulgence for Feb.

  11. You tell that fat chef, Heather! He lost all his cred when he couldn’t articulate himself in any way except with vulgarities. You give credit where credit is due, and I respect that. You should never have to pretend; not all local food is created equal. I had a burger at Carmen’s the other day that was a hockey puck. Unfortunately that is not the only place with that issue. Keep at it!

  12. ok, i dont really write negative comments but damn i took another look at that pic of the burger and had to write again. Seriously, a food writer for a paper endorsing machine made food. You are going to sit there and write a story as a food “critic/writer” and say denny’s is putting out a top ten burger in sonoma county? All the hard work people strive for all there lives to create a great meal in the middle of wine country and you dub the Slamburger top ten? You officially lost you street cred. If we were talking about fries or a shake ok, but a processed burger with a bun that has softner in it, meat not worthy of inmates and a sauce that looks like ron jeremys spunk, come on. Next thing you know you are going to tell us is San Quentins bread program outshines the french laundry. Roll up a fat one and pass the rest, cause I got five on it!

    1. How many of the freaking burgers in sonoma county are processed, frozen patties off the Sysco truck, from costco or Cash and Carry? Before you start wagging your finger at me, answer that. I’ve spent the last four years promoting sonoma county’s restaurants and it is a rare occasion that I give much credence to chains. But the fact is that that ridiculous burger was pretty tasty. So are the burgers at Jackson’s (my favorite), Stark’s and a hundred other places I’ve showcased. The day I wrote that story I raced at out lunch for a “local burger” promoted to me as “the best ever” and it was a dry piece of shoe leather. It pissed me off, and I’m tired of pretending that local food is always perfect. It isn’t. And chains are sometimes pretty good — which is why they are chains. Get off your high horse, fat chef.

  13. top ten burger? Did you drink some blanco basura before writing that. You and michael bauer should get together, next thing you know Burger King makes top 100 bay area restauants. Better yet Denny’s grand slam makes top ten breakfast meals of all time. Dont lower your standards to write a story. By the way, how is your toilet doing after that meal… Like a shotgun with chocolate bullets hit it?

  14. I agree that people need to relax about food and not be uptight about it. But I am not willing to sacrifice for something that I know for a fact was raised inhumanely in a disturbing factory farm where the workers aren’t being treated much better than the animals themselves. People in Sonoma County are lucky they can find good, quality $5 burgers that Heather featured in the same emails. And they should take pride in that. Wanting to eat good real food is not “snooty” or “snotty” whichever you prefer. It is a choice I make and hope others make to help the welfare of ourselves, the animals and the environment.

  15. Heather, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for making me laugh today. This artical and the comments made me laugh so hard. People in this area are so snotty about all the snooty food here in the wine country. Can’t people just relax and take a joke. Keep it up Heather…you are great!!!!!

    Sure, let’s support locally owned business, and I do 98% of the time. But this looks pretty good to me. Kind of like a croque madame white trash style. LOL LOL LOL

    And BTW SVO, not true that people who eat junk food don’t exersize….we exersize so that we CAN eat stuff like this. Better get going now, I better get to Denny’s before this sells out.

  16. I don’t understand why anyone would ever want to eat this burger. At $8.95 it is not a deal compared to the $5.00 burgers from all the local restaurants, like GTO’s and Henweighs that you have just also recently featured. People living in Sonoma County have such options that a review of Denny’s and its food just doesn’t seem necessary. Where this food came from and the practices of those farms is disgusting enough to not want this “food”.

      1. lol I too fell victim to “less than half” of this beast at around 12:30am a few weeks ago….It was good but I felt like a dirty man whore after eating what I could. No regrets though!

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