I’m always surprised at the number of people — especially women — who say they’re uncomfortable dining alone. Solo-eating adventures are such a treat, giving me the time and space to really enjoy my meal in peace, undistracted by bored teenagers or hangry spouses. Give me a table for one or, even better, a seat at the bar — preferably off to the side with a great view of the dining room action — and I’m a happy camper.
Yes, you may get a sidelong look of pity when you raise a single finger indicating “party of one,” but there’s nothing sad or lonely about it. I’m definitely having more fun eating with myself than the silent couple at the next table or exhausted parents desperately trying to enjoy a forced “date night.” I often have great conversations with other single diners when I’m feeling friendly. Or bury my face in a book (or phone) if I’m not.
I can’t think of any restaurant I wouldn’t go to solo, but as a lone diner, it can feel conspicuous at bustling, family-friendly restaurants or high-end eateries that cater to couples or groups. Splitting the difference, I’ve compiled a list of casual spots with great bar seating, great people-watching, great food and a welcoming atmosphere for anyone eating unaccompanied.
A few pro tips: If you’re going to sit at the bar, ask first if it’s okay to order food and eat there. Otherwise, you may be waiting for a menu that will never come. I like to dine on the earlier side when I’m alone. Single diners can get overlooked during very busy times. Finally, you’re absolutely not obligated to drink alcohol while eating at the bar, but it’s polite to make way for imbibing customers if the bar gets busy. And make sure to tip your bartender!
The best restaurants for solo dining
Valette: Though there are only a handful of seats, dining at the bar here is one of my absolute favorite Healdsburg experiences. While it’s still a white linen napkin affair, the elevated food feels somehow more approachable while I’m perched on a barstool. While the entire tasting menu at the bar might be awkward, it’s a perfect spot to hunker down with a glass of wine and a plate of duck breast with coastal huckleberries (and maybe a dessert). 344 Center St., Healdsburg, valettehealdsburg.com.
Duke’s Spirited Cocktails: Go on the earlier side to grab a seat at the bar (or settle into a bar table). Order a burger from next door’s Iggy’s Organic Burgers, dive into a Manhattan and watch the cast of characters parade through the door. 111 Plaza St., Healdsburg, drinkatdukes.com.
Lo and Behold: You will rarely be the only singleton at this post-work hospitality industry favorite. Bar seats are a premium, but there are plenty of other spots (including outdoors) to enjoy a cocktail and some “Almost Famous” chicken strips. 214 Healdsburg Ave., Healdsburg, loandbeholdca.com.
The Redwood: If you’re a fan of natural wines, you’ve already discovered this hot spot. But if you’re wine-curious, get an education and some tasty risotto at the bar or in the dining room. 234 S. Main St., Sebastopol, theredwoodwine.com.
Sushi Kosho: Soft seating in the new lounge area or at the slim bar are both great spots for dining alone, but you can also plop down at a table outside and enjoy watching evening shoppers. 6750 McKinley St., Sebastopol, theredwoodwine.com.
Bloom Carneros: Though you’ll often find families here on the weekend, this mostly outdoor restaurant is always a breath of fresh air, letting you clear your mind while nibbling on chef Jennifer McMurry’s seasonally-inspired dishes. 22910 Broadway, Sonoma, bloomcarneros.com.
Oso Sonoma: Bar seating is plentiful, and the excellent collection of small plates — including ceviche, mac and cheese or mole-braised tacos — is impressive. 9 East Napa St., Sonoma, ososonoma.com.
Willi’s Wine Bar: I sometimes grab a happy hour nosh and a glass of wine just because it’s Wednesday at this tucked-away Santa Rosa institution. You’ll never feel rushed nibbling on your crab tacos and can stroll around the neighborhood to stretch your legs afterward. 1415 Town and Country Drive, Santa Rosa., starkrestaurants.com.
The Spinster Sisters: The bar is the centerpiece of the dining room and a perfect spot to grab a light dinner on your own. Braised beans and greens are a favorite, but smaller plates like smoked trout dip are lovely. 401 S. A St., Santa Rosa, thespinstersisters.com.
Belly Left Coast Kitchen: If you want a little action but don’t have a date, head to this casual downtown Santa Rosa restaurant and grab a seat at the bar or outside. Happy hour is always hopping; there’s plenty of action to watch streetside, and the wall of taps is always flowing. 523 Fourth St., Santa Rosa, bellyleftcoastkitchenandtaproom.com.
Geyserville Gun Club: Shockingly good food and cocktails at this small town bar owned by a mega-talented chef. 21025 Geyserville Ave., Geyserville, geyservillegunclub.com.
Breakfast and brews
Tea Room Cafe: This charming little cafe offers breakfast all day as well as simple sandwiches and tasty tea elixirs. 316 Western Ave., Petaluma, tearoomcafe.com.
J&M Midtown Cafe: Though the vibe and the menu are classic greasy spoon, the chef takes special care to add special touches like house-smoked salmon and extra-yummy Hollandaise made from scratch. 1422 Fourth St., Santa Rosa, jm-midtowncafe.com.
Brew Coffee and Beer House: Beer and coffee are top-notch at this inclusive neighborhood cafe, along with creative sandwiches and toasts. We love the laid-back vibe and artsy crowd with our Golden Lattes. 555 Healdsburg Ave., Santa Rosa, brewcoffeeandbeer.com.